man might agree on seeing someone later
Signs Cheating

Signs He’s Seeing Someone Else: The Red Flags of Infidelity

We’ve all been there – you start to notice strange behavior from your partner, and you can’t help but wonder if those are signs he’s seeing someone else. Suddenly, you feel insecure, anxious, and unsure about the relationship. You want to trust him, but your gut tells you something is off. Do you confront him? Spy on his phone? Talk to friends? Ignore it and hope it goes away?

Knowing the common signs he’s seeing someone else can help give you clarity. In this article, we’ll go over the most giant red flags, how to confirm your suspicions, and then decide what to do next if he is seeing someone else. The key is tuning into your intuition – if you feel he’s being shady, he likely is. You deserve to be in a relationship built on trust and honesty.

According to research

  1. Sixty percent of relationships start at work.
  2. During their marriage, up to 60% of couples will engage in some sort of infidelity at least once.
  3. Of men who have extramarital affairs, 56% say their marriages are happy.
  4. Within a marriage, women and men cheat equally frequently, but the motivations behind women’s cheating differ greatly from those of men.
  5. Emotional fulfillment is the most frequent cause of a woman cheating on her husband.
  6. Studies regularly reveal that 2 to 3% of all children are the result of cheating.
  7. Among those under 30, infidelity is on the rise.
  8. Infidelity frequently goes undetected, even if the partner has suspicions, “Is he dating someone else?’
  9. When an affair first begins, most people are taken aback by how they behave.
  10. The majority of people acknowledge that they have fantasies about people other than their spouses.
What's Inside
  1. Signs He Interested in Someone Else: Distant And Advoidive 
  2. Signs He is Not Single: Routine and Habits
  3. You Notice Strange or Suspicious Behavior
  4. He Treats You Differently
  5. Confirming Your Suspicions
  6. Deciding What To Do Next
  7. Conclusion
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Signs He Interested in Someone Else: Distant And Advoidive 

One of the classic signs that he’s seeing someone else is that your partner withdrawing from the relationship emotionally and physically. You may notice:

1. Not Making Time For You, Canceling Plans Frequently

If your partner stops making time for you and constantly cancels plans, he could be seeing someone on the side. He may claim work is busy, when in reality, he’s getting together with the other woman.

2. Seeming Distracted, Not Fully Present When With You

A man who is cheating often appears distracted and emotionally unavailable during the time you spend together. You may feel he’s just going through the motions. His mind is elsewhere with the new relationship.

3. Less Communication and Contact, Takes Longer To Respond

A man who’s checking out of a relationship will be less engaged in routine communication. And it’s one of the most telltale signs he interested in someone else. He may take longer to return texts and calls or say he didn’t see your message. Lazy excuses for less contact allow him to connect with the other person.

4. Makes Excuses To Not Be Intimate

An affair often decreases a man’s desire to be intimate with his primary partner. If your physical relationship starts to decline, it could mean he’s getting those needs met somewhere else.

Signs He is Not Single: Routine and Habits

woman shocked by man changing his routine

Cheating causes ripple effects in a man’s normal routine as he accommodates the demands of juggling two relationships at once. You may notice such signs that he interested in someone else:

1. New Interests and Hobbies You Don’t Share

A new romance can inspire different interests that give him an excuse to be away. He may pick up new hobbies that don’t include you.

2. Working Late More Often

Cheating partners will suddenly have obligations that keep them away from home more, like unexplained overtime or work trips. These are covers for dates with the other woman.

3. Going Out With Friends More Without You

More guys’ nights out, poker games, or weekend trips with “friends” are ways for him actually to spend time with the affair partner.

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4. Making More Private Phone Calls

Another one standing out among all signs he is not single. In order to stay connected with the other woman, you’ll see an increase in frequent private calls, often outside or in another room.

5. Spending More Time Grooming His Appearance

When mentally checking out of a long-term relationship, men will put more effort into their physical appearance for the new partner they want to impress. Noticeably nicer clothes, going to the gym more often, styling his hair, etc.

You Notice Strange or Suspicious Behavior

When juggling an affair, your partner’s actions and explanations won’t add up. Pay attention to these signs that he is not single:

1. Being Very Secretive About Where He’s Going and Who He’s With

A huge red flag is when your partner suddenly becomes very secretive about his activities and social life. He’ll explain away mysterious blocks of time.

2. Lying or Making Excuses About Where He Was

You may catch your partner outright lying when you ask about his day or weekend plans. The dishonesty is a sign he needs to cover something up.

3. Unexplained Receipts or Charges

Check bank statements and receipts for any unusual purchases like gifts, hotels, or dinner bills for two he can’t justify, as it can be one of signs there is someone else.

4. Being Protective or Hiding His Phone and Devices

A man who’s cheating will act overly defensive of his phone and other devices. He doesn’t want you accessing any evidence.

5. Using New Social Media Accounts

The cheater may secretly open new accounts on apps and websites you don’t know about to stay connected with the other woman.

He Treats You Differently

disappointed man sitting at his chair

The guilty conscience of cheating can cause your partner to act differently towards you in an effort to justify his behavior. So, look for these signs he is in a relationship with someone else.

1. Less Affectionate, Doesn’t Say “I Love You”

He may pull back from his usual affectionate ways and stop doing thoughtful things for you. Saying “I love you” happens less often.

2. Picks Fights and Criticizes You More

Look out when he seems to pick fights and criticize you more. By blaming you for things, he feels less guilty for straying.

3. Makes You Feel Like You’re Annoying Him

Cheating men often shift their guilt by making their partner feel annoying, unreasonable, and paranoid for questioning things.

4. Blames You For Issues In The Relationship

The cheater rewrites history to make the problems in the relationship your fault. This serves as their rationale for cheating.

Confirming Your Suspicions

Have you noticed multiple signs he’s dating others? Here’s how to confirm whether your gut instinct is right:

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1. Following Your Intuition – If Something Feels Off, It Likely Is

First and foremost, trust your intuition. If his behavior makes you feel like something is wrong, it probably is. Your subconscious recognizes the subtle signs.

2. Looking For Evidence With A Spy App – Be Watchful For Clues

If you’re feeling suspicious about your partner’s behavior, consider installing a spy app on their phone. This can give you access to their text messages, call logs, and even GPS location. Look for any evidence that could confirm your suspicions about signs he met someone else. However, be prepared to see things you may not want to see.


The advantages of the spy app include the following:

  • Discreteness: Your partner will not know that you are monitoring their activity.
  • Real-time updates: You can receive updates on their activities in real-time, providing more accurate information.
  • Multiple features: Some spy apps include additional features such as social media tracking and call recording, giving you a more comprehensive view of your partner’s activities.
  • Easy to use: Most spy apps are user-friendly and can be installed quickly, even for those who are not tech-savvy.

Deciding What To Do Next

shocked man that he was spotted on seeing someone else

Discovering your partner’s affair is devastating, but you do have options on how to proceed, as it is as crucial in relationships as knowing how to tell if your fwb is seeing someone else:

1. Confronting Him – Be Prepared For Denial or Excuses

Directly confront your partner with the evidence, but know cheaters often deny or make excuses when caught. Stand firm on what you know.

2. Ending The Relationship – Infidelity May Be A Dealbreaker For You

For many, cheating signals the relationship is over. It’s very reasonable to end things if monogamy is expected.

3. Forgiving and Rebuilding Trust – Possible If He Takes Responsibility

With commitment from both people, couples can heal after an affair. The cheater must admit fault fully and try to earn back trust.


Feeling your partner drift away emotionally can be incredibly painful. While the signs he’s seeing someone else may at first be subtle, tuning into your intuition can detect when something feels off in the relationship. Confirming whether cheating is occurring gives you the power to confront it head-on and make informed decisions about what you want moving forward. But know that you deserve complete honesty and faithfulness in a relationship. Don’t ignore red flags or betrayals of your trust. Prioritize your self-worth first, not your thought, “Is he seeing other women?”

Catherine Mayers

Catherine is a psychologist and certified relationship coach with over 10 years experience helping couples heal after infidelity. Her approach provides a judgement-free space to process emotions, get to root issues, and take active steps to reconnect or mindfully part ways. Catherine offers research-based strategies to manage difficult emotions, rebuild broken trust, and improve communication. She provides empathetic guidance to empower couples during this challenging time, both through direct counseling and her insightful articles on repairing relationships after cheating.

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